i am lost, very lost.
i dont know who to believe.
i dont know the truth.
but i chose to believe her, rather than you.
cos i see no need in her wanting to lie to me.
she wouldnt gain anything.
but you, on the other hand, would gain your so called pride and dignity.

the night you clarified things.
didnt you say you lied about the two timing issue?
you said it didnt happen at all, you made it up. haha.
why do i hear something else now?

you admited she tried to get close to you, and you guys hugged.
you said that's all, but it doesnt seem to be the case.
dont tell me i am assuming.
dont tell me i am crazy and start showing me your attitude problem.
and dont tell me i am making things difficult for you.
stop that line.

let me tell you what you did, and you clearly know what you did.
in actual fact, you did two time me.
let me tell you what i know.

not only did you guys hugged, you kissed too.
maybe there's more, who knows.
haha.

if you want to leave graciously in my eyes,
sorry to disappoint you.
you didnt.

in fact, you left in a way, much worst than thomas.
yes, let me tell you in your face.
even though he hurt me, he didnt do things behind my back.
the hurt you left behind, is no better.

if you despise him for the way he treated me,
ask yourself, are you even ANY better?
if you call him a dog, maybe you should call yourself that too.

ask any girl, a guy who throws temper and vents his anger on his gf is better than a guy who two times her. who would they choose if they had to choose one?

i'd rather someone throw money into my face,
than to do things behind my back, and kiss some girls behind me.
and claim he didnt.
what a good liar you are.

you are worst than him.
you called him a beast didnt you?
so what are you?
how about meanest beast?

i trusted every word you said, i did.
you told me you did it, fine, i believed and forgave.
i know there might be a possibilty you might do it again.
but i didnt care much.
cos all i wanted to was to be with you.
to start afresh.

but now, knowing you did it, and then you saying you didnt in fact, when in actual fact you did. i dont know the reason for doing so, why? cos you wanted to leave with pride and dignity? if that was what you wanted, you didnt. you left in a way, a dog left. if you had other reasons for doing so, which i believe you didnt, tell me straight in my face so i wouldnt make you out to be what you are now to me.

you didnt bother to communicate with me when things went wrong. you just wanted to be the way you are, to show me how well you are getting on with life, didnt you? you wanted to avoid me, and ask me to stop making things difficult for you. it irks me.

it irks me to know i was with someone i dont like for 11 mths.
sounds quite familiar eh?

whatever promises that you made,
what shit that people do not think before making them and you did, and what shit tt my smile matters and this line, " i will do anything for you as long as you continue smiling."

you made me lose all trust i had overnight.
you made me lose all the respect i had for you,
or rather i thought you had.
whatever positive feelings and thoughts i had about you,
your dignity you had,
disappeared in the night together with me.

you made me cry again.
you did such things that i detest you so much now.
and it is the first time i want it quits.

dont blame me for writing all these down.
and dont blame the person for telling me.
i rmbered you asked me, what would my friends think of you.
i dont give a damn on how you feel or where to put your face anymore.
cos you were the one who made me the fool.
everyone knew except me, i am the ultimate fool.
so, stop it.

brianna
230686