i suddenly have alot of thoughts in my mind at this hour, and have the urge to blog. it's gonna be a long post.

so i went to watch king kong after work with my my friends and it was a really long movie. three hour plus, and king kong only came out after an hour plus despite him being the main character. haha. but i thought the movie was nice. it was touching that king kong actually did fall in love with a human, and how he protected her. fighting the animals and bullets, saving her life with all his might. isnt this the power of love?

took a cab back with steven and passed by mr bean. and it occured to me that it has been almost a year. almost a year ago where i sat with huijun, gladys and chris where we slacked and crapped for the new year. i still rmbered tt night where summerspoon was still operating, and after work at pasta, went up to look for the 3 of them and we headed down to mr bean tgther.

it seems like these just happened not long ago. but it has been a year.
we talked about vincent and i counted the days we havent met. has been 6 days. when everything ends, dont people tend to lose contact and the care and concern goes along with it as well? but these 6 days, time doesnt seem to pass as slowly as it did before.

despite the busy schedule, i do believe tt if you really really do care for tt person, even after things have ended, you'd want to show your concern, and a simple sms would do. it doesnt really take tt long to send a sms right? i rmbered zhen telling me, how do we know if tt person really cares for you or is he/she caring for the sake of caring just cos they are your partners. and we can tell so when everything ends. haha.

i saw a case where a guy really cared. despite the girl being attached, he showed his care and concern, not cos he wanted her badly, or he wanted to tear them up, but cos he cared from his bottom of his heart. so even when he knows he wont be able to be with the girl, he doesnt stop caring for her. when she's down, he makes her laugh and chat through the night with her to make her feel better. roy told me this person is a matured guy, and i thought it's quite true. perhaps so.

ask yourselves, everytime a r/s ends, does your partner cont to sms you to ask how you are, rmber to eat, sleep early etc? probably not. yayadada, when they are chasing you, they do everything and anything you want. haha.

anyway it's saturday. vincent's last day of work of the week, and sunday would be his prayers. he's fine, and i'm glad he is, just tt he's nt having enuf sleep. that's life when you work in the f&b line. haha.

i do miss him.
i do miss the night chats we have, i miss his voice.
i miss suaning him, seeing his pek chek face.
i miss him pinching my cheeks, and i'd give a stupid face and he will coax me and let me win. haha. those were the days. i dont know if he is really happy, but right now, his career comes first, and i really do hope everything will be well for him.

jiayou le vin!
rmber the 7 jiayous?
one more time ok?
you will never see this, but i just want to tell you sorry. sorry cos i realised, it was me and not you who caused these. there were things where i just saw the surface, and it only occured to me after all these. i failed to understand, i failed to not compare. and i have yet to thank you for the heart you folded. i have replaced it with the pictures, so dont get jealous :)

few nights ago, stayed at al dente till almost 4, drank a little with eric and roy, and roy told me alot of stuffs, his point of views on eric and me, and it really made me ponder alot. eric shocked me with his actions, and made me really want to give in. i can really feel the care that he gives. i know he will give in alot, put in his efforts, but, i dont know what's stopping me. sigh. emotional hurt.

played mahjong with yuling, dingli and dragged eric along too on tuesday. was so freaking tired but i still played anyways. havent played it since yuling's bday, so that's almost a mth ago. haha. watched perhaps love with eric, and it was boring lah. not that nice, not that touching. hurhur.

the break is here, but i still got to go back for lessons, for projects and meetings. gonna spend all my free time working! i'm broke. sighs. seems like working here doesnt make me rich cos they deduct cpf which is very irritating lah! ends up me getting paid 4.50 per hour or so only if i would to calculate cash i'm getting.

my schedule is almost packed, but i try to come online as often as i can to read the blogs! to know how my friends are coping and how's life, and i just read afew. most of them are getting on fine and happy, so deeply in love :) juan, eileen, ning etc. christmas is around, and lots of festive seasons just round the corner. fortunate couples, attached people, spend the special occasion with your loved ones! it's really a blessing to love and be loved. and just hanging out with them should really make you happy eh.

hurt is inevitable, but i still think it's worth it for all the happy times spent tgther. these are memories that will always stay with you no matter what happens, no matter where you are. and it belongs to just the two of you. just so sweet.

and this reminds me of juan!
girl, your one year anniversary over le ma?
if i didnt rmber wrongly, should be ard this period right?


heh. time past so fast ah, still rmber last time when you told me how you all started, so lang man! treasure him hor, dont always bully him la. he treat you so nice, really nice, and really happy to see you so in love! see you soon!

my eyes are starting to get tired alrdy lah.
it's almost 6am! i going to bed.
enjoy your weekends!

i do know now, that i do matter to you. though you let me go, though we choose to part, it's cos you want me to be happier than i am. thank you for everything you have done, you have done more than i have, so stop saying you arent fit, that you are useless. i will never forget how it all ended. i still heart you. and i want you to know, that if i'm your best bday gift, you're my best christmas gift. see you soon vin.

brianna
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